I just made a decision that I would not work on the new market research project and now I am back in the library again, Just like in 2021 when I quit my job and stayed in the library trying to prepare for the English level test and learn Dutch by myself. Now I am really learning Dutch because French broke my heart :) Sometimes when you look back at the past, you just keep wondering which mysterious force pushes you to become who you are now. Me again, being proudly unemployed. That's a joke since I just cried this morning feeling all the anxieties about the uncertainty of life. One of my dreams is to become a writer. I actually thought about the idea of applying for the creative writing program after completing a course at Berkeley called people of mixed racial descent. I loved the course so much that I had a strong desire to make my voice (and the people that can relate to my experience) heard through writing. Then I came to doubt whether I write in English or Chi